As adults our friendships change from what they were in high school and college. As we grow up we get used to being polite with others to the point that we hold everyone at arms length. People don’t want to be around others who are emotional, so we keep those emotions close to our hearts to be shared in journals and with therapists.
We’ve become more and more distant with each-other to the point that we’re missing the connections and the opportunities for growth that come from those connections.
I was thinking about one friend form college who always made me want to be more than I was. She always seemed to have her life together, and was very sure of herself and committed to what she wanted to do. Sure, she had some insecurities, but she was also very open about who she was and what she was focused on. It was always refreshing and made me more sure of myself and my own decisions. She always seemed so in control, and drove me to keep that control in myself.
I had another friend from high school who was always incredibly open and relaxed. She was sure about who she was, and didn’t worry about what others thought of her. She would rely on us completely when she needed us, and we could rely on her no matter what was going on. I was constantly challenged to let go, relax, rely on others and always be available to help.
Today I’d have to say the main person who challenges me is Rob. We’ve created a friendship which has a lot of accountability, well, I’m accountable to him, and I often wonder what Rob would think about what I do. But we don’t see each-other all the time, or even talk regularly, so it’s an odd friendship.
I have another friend I’ve worked through a couple things together, but it’s more about being open to talk with each-other, without much challenging of each-other, though I think we’ve both grown a lot since we were talking regularly.
Who pushes your limits? Who do you have in your life who really makes you want to be more than you already are?
What are you challenging to be better simply through your own actions and beliefs?