Thursday, August 16, 2007

The Fifth Way to Ask

I'm sure everyone wants to know what happened with my "example" from Four Ways to Ask.  Turns out there was a fifth way I hadn't considered.

There's the option where your wife never even reads your blog post and you take care of the problem yourself.

In my example, we ended up at school and I picked up Rachel's blankets and brought them home.  It wasn't until after we got home that Erin read the blog post.

The problems with this solution abound.  Not the least of which is that I had to do something to solve the problem.  What do people take me for, a helpful husband and father?

There's also the problem that I wasn't able to "educate" my wife in the ways she made a mistake.  I couldn't even make it a subtle chastisement.

In the long run though, I suppose this is really the best solution.

There was nothing we could do to have the blankets washed before school.  It was just fine to wait and solve the problem without causing any grief.  Besides, it turns out it was my suggestion to wash the sheets Monday, so, in some small way, it was my fault for not magically getting the blankets without entering Rachel's classroom.

Truly though, taking care of the problem yourself really is the best answer.  Why cause grief when you can actually support your spouse, or someone else, by solving the problem and simply moving on.  It's those behind the scenes support and help which, in the long run, change the world.

Just so you know, Erin enjoyed pointing out how I was partly responsible.  She also did realize she forgot to pick the stuff up, but decided it wasn't that important.  Not that important that our daughter slept in her own filth, I'm not sure I agree (but I'm a guy, we do everything in our own filth).

So, in all it worked out very well, and I think I have to recommend this fifth solution.

Peace,
+Tom

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